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(via apriki)

Do’s And Don’ts Of The Bush

thefrenemy:

DO: check the bath drain after you are landscaping your bush. Do not be a bad roommate or a bad human being by leaving them all over your shampoo bottle. Those little fuckers fly everywhere, so check the ceiling and the bodega next door. Call your parents and see if any flyaways landed in your childhood bedroom.

DO NOT: listen to your partner’s demands about bush preference. If they demand, grow them to be so large you are not a human anymore, you are like that weird red hair monster Bugs Bunny is always dealing with. Blink at your partner through the pube hair and look confused.

DO: Listen to your partner’s preference and determine if you would feel comfortable obliging them. Think about doing this instead of, say, buying them a hard-to-haul-around birthday cake. Or make them a cake, style your bush, and eat all the cake for taking the 20 minutes out of your day to do something laborious!

DON’T: damn somebody for having a preference, damn them for trying to make you force it onto you. If they aren’t forcing it? They are good human! Hug them and feed them cookies!

DO: shave your legs in the shower and luxuriously forget to shave your bush. Feel naughty and invigorated. Run your hand along your smoothie legs and then evil-y twirl your pubes like a villian’s moustache while he is plotting.

DO: style it much like the hair on your head—the way you like it, and because you think it would look good on Jennifer Lawrence, too.

DON’T: use regular shaving cream, use that thick bikini line gel that creams up like god damn merengue and makes spot-cleaning a lot more fun. Don’t eat it though.

DO: prepare to get weird infectious looking ingrown hairs at the most inconvenient times. Sorry peeps.

DO: try different styles! You’ll never know if a star shape, a portrait of Justin Timberlake’s face, or just a little off on the sides will be your preferred look.

DO: scratch yourself through your pockets when you make the rookie mistake of trimming and shaving before doing anything like leave the house for three days after grooming.

DO: keep razor blades in there if you have the length to hide them in. Like a little deathly Christmas tree!

DON’T: forget to put on your bathing suit the day before you go swimming and see if you like what’s going on down there. One time I had to stick seaweed and starfish all over my lower half so you couldn’t see the Lady Gaga weave I had down there.

DO: get a weave? I don’t know, this sounds interesting. Everybody constantly says how much they thick, full hair is in so maybe I am onto the most something ever.

DO: live dangerously. Going on a date? Most likely, you’ll only get lucky if you don’t groom to your preference beforehand. It’s a double-edged sword. Or a win-win..you could be with someone cute who totally likes that you keep a small poodle in your pants.

DO: go with a friend for a waxing. I have a specific pal who promised to come with me and make fun of me while she hears the hair rip.

DO: respect everybody’s choices for the bush they do or do not have. Support that bush. Support your fellow women. Hold them.

DO: Get waxed and wear a shirt for a week straight that says “I Survived Waxing” and if people laugh at it grab their arm and wax it off.

DO: Embrace the hair. Even if you don’t like it personally, respect it and congratulate it for growing there. Groom it if you want to. Leave it totally wild if you don’t. Find out what it’s like to cut the inside of your vulva with a razor blade as a new experience. Find out what it feels like to have so much going down there you can’t wear tight pants without looking like Beyonce in Goldmember is hiding in your crotch.

DO: follow the one real rule: Keep clean. Be happy.

AS ALWAYS DON’T: fall victim to the man and the patriarchy. Misandry! Misandry! Hair! Beautiful hair! Burn all men!

(via emma-soup)

neuksei:

even if u dont like one direction u kinda do like one direction

(via sad-ists)

(via pinturasnegras)

How to talk to your daughter about her body, step one: don’t talk to your daughter about her body, except to teach her how it works.

Don’t say anything if she’s lost weight. Don’t say anything if she’s gained weight.

If you think your daughter’s body looks amazing, don’t say that. Here are some things you can say instead:

“You look so healthy!” is a great one.

Or how about, “you’re looking so strong.”

“I can see how happy you are – you’re glowing.”

Better yet, compliment her on something that has nothing to do with her body.

Don’t comment on other women’s bodies either. Nope. Not a single comment, not a nice one or a mean one.

Teach her about kindness towards others, but also kindness towards yourself.

Don’t you dare talk about how much you hate your body in front of your daughter, or talk about your new diet. In fact, don’t go on a diet in front of your daughter. Buy healthy food. Cook healthy meals. But don’t say “I’m not eating carbs right now.” Your daughter should never think that carbs are evil, because shame over what you eat only leads to shame about yourself.

Encourage your daughter to run because it makes her feel less stressed. Encourage your daughter to climb mountains because there is nowhere better to explore your spirituality than the peak of the universe. Encourage your daughter to surf, or rock climb, or mountain bike because it scares her and that’s a good thing sometimes.

Help your daughter love soccer or rowing or hockey because sports make her a better leader and a more confident woman. Explain that no matter how old you get, you’ll never stop needing good teamwork. Never make her play a sport she isn’t absolutely in love with.

Prove to your daughter that women don’t need men to move their furniture.

Teach your daughter how to cook kale.

Teach your daughter how to bake chocolate cake made with six sticks of butter.

Pass on your own mom’s recipe for Christmas morning coffee cake. Pass on your love of being outside.

Maybe you and your daughter both have thick thighs or wide ribcages. It’s easy to hate these non-size zero body parts. Don’t. Tell your daughter that with her legs she can run a marathon if she wants to, and her ribcage is nothing but a carrying case for strong lungs. She can scream and she can sing and she can lift up the world, if she wants.

Remind your daughter that the best thing she can do with her body is to use it to mobilize her beautiful soul.

bagmilk:

2014 is gonna be tough because it’s hard to change a 3 to a 4

(via voldymore)

edenliaothewomb:

Léa Seydoux, photographed by Nan Goldin for V magazine, winter 2013.

(via ruthwilson)

we-believe-in-castiel-and-you:

toms3dhuckfest:

weaponizedwit:

damedurohan:

favourite tropes + TITLE DROP

If a line of dialogue is the title of the episode, movie, or book, it obviously must have some great significance. If it sounds completely random, that just means the true meaning of the title has yet to be revealed. So when a character is heard using the title in dialogue, the audience sits up and takes notice, because the scriptwriter has just planted a neon sign that flashes this conversation is important.

THEY SAID THE THING!

and then there’s Doctor Who

and then there’s

(via myforestlove)

kitty-en-classe:

ph. Étienne Saint-Denis

(via ruthwilson)

richardlawson:

"It’s like you’re my mirror / My mirror staring back at me"

(via emma-soup)